one of my many epiphanies

I've had way too many epiphanies in the past few days. I need to write them down just so I won't forget because I have been very lazy to type an entry about them when I get home. Sayang ang thoughts!

Take for example, yesterday. I spent several hours at the St. Luke's Medical Center - International Eye Institute. Mama got her eyes lasered five times because the doctor wanted to check for diabetes complications (or at least something like that). So there were five procedures done in about three hours. I went with her because the last time she had the procedures done, she vomitted because of the intravenous medicine and well, they laser the eyes! That must feel really uncomfortable. So imagine me sitting still at the waiting area on an uncomfortable couch with a dozen other people who are waiting-- companions and relatives alike. It was boring but I tried to amuse myself by staring at the wall (sarcasm there). There was t.v. but the volume was too low I couldn't hear it. In the evening we went to Mama's other doctor and guess who we bumped into? Tita Yette and Carlo! Tita Yette worked with my father in Myanmar and Carlo is her eldest son. He was my playmate for a few years because we lived nearby (almost like a neighbor!) so we had carpools and playdates together with our sisters. So it was really great to bump into childhood friends. Mama caught up with Tita Yette although it was heartbreaking to know that she's going to undergo chemotherapy for a stage 1 ovarian cancer. Everyone's hopeful, though. It's not something to worry about. The chemotherapy is for safety precaution just in case the cancer spreads. All our prayers go to Tita Yette.

The epiphany yesterday was all bout "letting things be according to God's will". I told Tita Yette to "think positive" about the whole chemo-cancer thing because everything's going to be alright. She said she was reading this book about accepting things as they are and not questioning it. Thinking positive won't drive any bad circumstance away. You have to accept things as they are because all the things that are happening in our lives are already pre-planned by GOD all the way back to the time when we were unborn. So it got me thinking that she is absolutely right. When we begin to accept things as they are and that everything has a purpose according to God's plan, we become less bitter and more peaceful with the world because we don't fight what is already set for us by God. No, there's no room for despair and bitterness or even anger towards God when we suffer from mishaps. Everything has its purpose. We just have to let things bee. I, myself, became more at peace with myself when I prayed today at St. Jude Church that I'm surrendering everything to Him because I trust His plans.

Let me share with you a beautiful prayer, which my friend Albert forwarded to me last Easter Sunday:

"Lord, when I lose hope because all my plans have come to nothing, help me to remember that your love is always greater than my disappointments and your plans for my life are always better than my dreams. Amen."

I hope I made my point. Carpe diem!