i'm in a crappy internet place with noisey boys playing counter strike. the noise is unimaginable. on the way here i thought i could write which was the sole purpose why i came with my sister (she's working on her thesis). must scout for a new monitor or get the old one fixed.

i forgot to talk about the orientation we had for UP Pahinungod for Hospice Care Volunteers. i had to drag my sleepyhead off the bed at 6 AM in the morning for the 8 AM orientation. i was surprised to see that there were only 16 of us but to the head nurse in-charge of hospice care at Palcare, it was a big number already. the head nurse who lectured about hospice care said that we will be taking care of stage 4 cancer patients. i volunteered for ward visits and counselling which means that i have to be emotionally strong for the cancer patients. i can imagine myself in the ward with death hanging thick in the air trying to be as strong as possible to whoever is going to be assigned to me. but the thing is i feel like i can go through anything because i already set my heart into doing this. our group of volunteers is the first batch since hospice care became defunct for a few years. i haven't been interviewed yet, though. it's sort of like counselling so that the people in-charge of the hospice program would get to know the volunteers more and if they are emotinally capable of handling stage 4 cancer patients.

it was a different feeling sitting there inside the conference room at the Pahinungod office. i thought that this was the place where my life-changing process would start and it felt so good to know that i do have a calling to do this work. i feel like i've been putting too much time on myself and less on other people that it's about time to get a move on.

how about the rest of junior year and time management? God will find the way. if this is my calling then it doesn't matter how hectic my schedule can be during 2nd sem. it will still be fulfilling to finally share my life and actually help people get through tough times. i can't wait for the seminars to start. we have to undergo seminars on counselling, dealing with death, etc. before being sent off to the cancer ward at the Philippine General Hospital.

i want to skip the whole seminar process and meet the people.

hopefully, volunteer work will make me a better person and i will be able to make people's lives a little easier than it currently is (i really HOPE this would happen). most of all, i met a lot of new people with the same passion as i do and they will become my support group as well when the volunteer work starts. at some point (the head nurse said) we would become burnt out and drained after counselling sessions and depressed, even. but with a support group to help us through, we will be just fine. that is so cool rather than intimidating. :)

wish me luck! :)