last night at 2am, i couldn't sleep. so i texted a friend bugging him to keep me company while i was wide awake, asking all sorts of silly questions. i told him how much i hated school, that i didn't want to study anymore (half meaning it, by the way...). then he said:

"maybe the reason why you're feeling like that is because you're still on vacation mode. when you're back in school with your friends, you'll forget that you hated school."

true enough. this morning although i woke up at 5am and left the house while it was still dark outside, i was still quite energetic throughout the day. fun times i had with my blockmates. we were required to watch a movie from the Metro Manila Film Festival. at least one of the four best films my professor wanted us to watch because he said he would include some questions in the exam. so after class, my friends and i marched to Robinson's Ermita and bought a ticket to a moive. Aishte Imasu (I Love You) was a good movie, i tell you. it would give you a glimpse of how life was during the Japanese days, give you further understanding that not all Japanese were mean, and most of all it would make you (or at least try to) appreciate homosexuals more. there were no dull moments all throughout the movie. no matter how tired i was from sleeping for just 2-3 hours, i was pretty much awake and very much interested. the movie made me cry over a lot of parts and *drum roll please*.... Dennis Trillo is such HOTNESS.

Sir Atoy opened my eyes today (figuratively) by making the class realize that of all movies, we should appreciate Filipino movies more because they are realistic. we are able to connect to them because it is within our setting. we watch Hollywood movies because the effects are cool and the story is well written. but the best movies are found in the Filipino movies because it shows us the world that we are living in, not in some far away foreign land. but of course, it won't hurt to watch Hollywood films. it's just that we should appreciate our local films more and give credit to the really good ones. never mind the crappy ones.

we were given assignments on writing a biography of ourselves. he said that by asking ourselves the question, "why am i like this today?" you are able to go back to your own personal history and come up with conclusion on why you are what you are now. it does make sense, you know. every little bit of decision we made in the past played a major role in what we are today. it's pretty interesting to go back and look at those decisions that we made. afterall, history is not just about studying the past but by studying history, we are able to understand the present situation.

so on my way home with all the good things i learned today in school, i couldn't help but remember what my guy friend said. he was right. the reason why i was so lazy was because i've been on vacation for weeks and it felt too good to end. i also mused on how ironic it is to feel extremely happy in the place where i can feel completely miserable at times-- SCHOOL! but that's just the good thing about studying. it's a matter of balancing the good things from the bad. the bad may be the pressure, the hectic skeds, loads of schoolwork, and more pressure... but the good ones make me realize how much of a lucky duck i am for being where i am and experiencing the taste of reality within the walls of UPM.

school is great that way. everyday you learn new things. some really big and some things small.

i won't mind sleeping for just 2 hours and be grumpy half the day if in the end i'd be smiling this wide before i sleep. my only wish is that i won't forget the lessons i've learned in college because i'm a forgetful person. i hope the bits and pieces would linger on for a while until they get lost somewhere at the back of my head.

good night world.