i will sing, i will praise

long overdue gradeschool reunion photos :) some are from my cam but most are care of Hana and Jezrel (thanks guys!). heeh :)

switched back to blogspot's premade template because i feel like it. i can't seem to stick to one particular template because i'm indecisive that way. but oh well. i said i'd stay away from the internet but look at me now. i should be in bed because it's almost midnight (haha feeling Cinderella!). but i'm still enjoying the sound of rain outside my window. it's rare, you know. it was really hot today. i thought i'd get heatstroke or something on my way home. today i realized how good it feels to feel "infinite" (if you've read The Perks of Being a Wallflower, you'll get what i mean) despite the imperfections of life. like shit happens, yes. but the imperfections of life is what makes life perfect. yes? think about it. when everything's perfect, you'll no longer appreciate high times anymore because it's like normal for you to be high like that. i need space for self-improvement like i want to know GOD more. i have a strong faith, that's for sure. but i feel the need to do more like maybe pay more attention to the Bible because honestly, i don't know much about the Bible.

do you know this song by Don Moen? it's called I Will Sing.

Lord You seem so far away. A million miles or more it feels today.
And though I haven't lost my faith, I must confess right now that it's hard for me to pray.
But I don't know what to say and I don't know where to start.
But as you give the grace with all that's in my heart.

I will sing.
I will praise even in my darkest time through the sorrow and the pain.
I will sing. I will praise.
Lift my hands to honor You because Your word is true. I will sing.

i want to know God more. i want to be a better person. i want to speak less ill off people. the past sunday while hanging out with Jez, we talked about faith. she asked me (or was i the one who asked her?) if i was religious... i said i don't think i'm religious but i'm a very spiritual person and i believe in a Higher Being-- GOD. as much as possible i want to live a good life by offering my life to HIM and to people as well. i want to learn to be more of a "human doing" than just a "human being". i want to be able to feel that i've accomplished something after this life... kind of like what Anne Frank said in her diary when she said she wanted to live forever even after she leave this world. there was something peaceful about walking at the UP campus with trees and all as Jez and i talked about our faith. the only very wrong thing about it all was the weather because it was humid. but the surrounding trees helped a lot. at least it sort of provided a little cooling in the air. :)

if you remember the line in the movie A Walk to Remember, Landon mentioned that "Jamie's love was like the wind. I can't see it but I can feel it all the time." Same goes for GOD's love.

wish me luck on my journey to self-discovery and getting closer to GOD. i pray that i won't stray away.