palm sunday

last night i stayed up until 3.30am watching movies while studying. Sabrina. such a great movie and the movie had to end in Paris. sigh. harrison ford was charming in an arrogant kind of way. i was gushing and squirming in delight while watching the movie which made me thank my lucky stars that it was past midnight and i was the only one awake.

then i watched a walk to remember for the third time. as usual, i enjoyed it again and cried alone. i wasn't able to enjoy the film the first time i saw it because i was too busy criticizing the film and comparing it with the novel. the next two times i saw it, i already forgot the details in the book so appreciated the movie. sigh. yesterday, there was mush overload in the living room. but over Lindt Noir chocolate and a few glances on my notes... i enjoyed bonding with myself.

i even downloaded mp3s of Mandy Moore's Cry and New Radical's Someday We'll Know. just shoot me. hehe.

did you know that the book was actually inspired by Nicholas Sparks's sister Danielle Sparks who, like Jamie Sullivan, battled cancer at a young age? she was also religious, was not among the "popular kids" in school, fell in love with a popular guy, and like Jamie... battled and died of cancer. Nicholas Sparks based the book on the love story of the two. his sister and the guy got married but Danielle died at the age of 35.

the reason why i like Sparks's novels (for reasons that some people could not understand and sometimes even make fun of..) is that he bases his writing on real life experiences-- things that actually happened to him which is the reason why i find his novels moving.

A Message in a Bottle is also one of my favorites no matter how tragic the ending is.

i realized that if i was in Jamie's shoes, i would not care about some "things" that i worry about today. i would live like she did-- not caring about what other people think of me. i'd live life to the fullest and do what i've always wanted to do. it's like liberating myself and freeing myself from the strings that have been manipulating me like a puppet-- societal norms, people's harsh judgements, and the cruel world, in particular.

i think it's about time i did that. so far, i've taken baby steps into doing what i really want to do. i'm kind of learning to liberate myself from expecting too much from myself because i know that as long as i'm doing what i really like to do, i will be LIVING.

look what i discovered just today: Book Browse and yesterday i browsed Books for Less's website and saw books that i want there for just 200+ pesos like Girl, Interrupted. yey!